I go to counseling, without shame or embarrassment, to get help for my eating issues. It’s been a difficult and wonderful journey. Currently I am in a group where we learn DBT skills. (Look that up if you are interested.)
One of the skills we are learning is how to make decisions from our “wise mind.” The wise mind is that place where the emotional mind and the logical mind intersect. It’s where I make a choice, not just using emotion or logic but both. Put together in perfect balance. The result is usually a tremendous sense of peace. Nothing wrong with emotions or logic, but often I make decisions solely based on one or the other. I’m learning to STOP. And then pray and wait. As I contemplate, my intuition kicks in and the Holy Spirit guides me to the wise mind.
For example, I have an argument with John. He leaves to go to work and I am sitting in the house alone. Emotionally, this is where I usually turn to food for comfort. I will make myself pancakes and all will be well. Logically, I sit and try to understand why we fought. I make a list of pros and cons and walk through the fight. I make assumptions based on what I believe to be true.
Both of these responses are human.
But now I am learning to STOP. Wait and pray. Then I try to combine the emotional and logical. I give heed to my emotions because they often communicate something I need to know. I listen to the logical side of events, too. AND THEN: I pray and try to lean on intuition. What happened and why? What would be a healthy choice for me at this moment? What would the consequences be?
As I practice this, the wise mind comes easier and quicker.
Why is this something I thought I would share on my blog? Many of you, like me, are emotional eaters. We have an emotion and we eat. Cause and effect. A little road of neuron synapses fire up with this pattern and the groove is well worn in our brains.
Nothing changes if nothing changes. (This is a 12 step saying.)
So I am trying to change. Just saying no doesn’t work with me. I have to teach myself new skills and finding my wise mind is one of them. If you, like me, are an emotional eater, google wise mind and read up on it and start practicing. It works.
Have you ever heard of this or tried it?